VDay.

It sounds like a bomb. It sounds like something I should be scared of and running terrified from. This year, thank God, that is not the case.

I love love. I love seeing all the flowers, chocolates and love notes that those around me received from the person they care about most. The pinks and reds and all around cheeriness make my day 10x better. Which is why this blog will most likely suck because I’m in an all around great mood after yesterday’s festivities. Though I will admit, that I would be lying if I said some part of me wasn’t wishing I had someone to do all the lovey-dovey stuff with, but I can’t really miss what may not have ever been there.

I was in love with someone the past two Valentine’s that did not like that day the same way I did. He saw it as more of an obligation and that made it harder to enjoy. We’re different people in that way, something that can’t be changed. He did try, both years, he gave it as much effort as he could. But for me, Valentine’s Day is a time to get overly excited and I love spending months planning out the perfect gift that will make that special person know how much they mean to me. Gleeful to the point of stupidity is the way to describe it. I think I permanently lost my fingerprints last year from super-gluing the stack of ‘52 Reasons I Love You‘ cards that I made for him.

So in fairness to him, he probably wasn’t prepared for how much this day meant to me. The whole rest of the year I am very far from sappy. I have a hard time directly saying I love you to even my own mother. This type of thing doesn’t normally come easy for me. Which is why I place such great importance on this one day of the year. It gives me an excuse in my messed up head to let those around me finally know they are loved by me. I can get as sickly sweet as I want, because it’s a requirement!

I place so much unfair pressure on this day that I can see how it becomes nearly impossible for anyone else to compete with the idea I have in my head for it. He never stood a chance.

So maybe from this point forward I’ll take the opportunity to try to make Valentine’s Day every day of 2013. Little surprises for those I love, stepping out of my comfort zone and voicing my feelings, you know, all that normal stuff. Because all this pressure is getting a little suffocating.

(Proudly displaying the first VDay gift I ever received.)