I have to say that I have really mixed feelings about being back in the dating world. On the one hand it’s really exciting to think that the person I’m meant to spend my whole life with (because yes, I still believe in that.) is still out there. I mean, if I had diluted myself into thinking my relationship before was good I can’t imagine how amazing the right one will feel.

On the other more obnoxious hand I’m less than excited about the dating process. I hate to disappoint people and I also hate to be disappointed and I realize there will probably be a lot of that in between now and then. I was a bit closed off before when it came to guy’s and my emotions and now that I’ve actually been vulnerable and hurt I can’t imagine it’s going to get any better. I just know that I don’t want to be one of those people who just bounces from person to person. There’s no satisfaction for a life like that. I look forward to someone always having my back and being there to come home to. Oh well, call me a sucker.

So I’m also in Bangor, which is not a lost cause but it’s not exactly brimming with eligible bachelor’s my age. Which is why I’m excited to get out of town and go visit Abbey in NYC. While I’m not looking to go crazy it will be nice to see the other options beyond the pine trees. I caught myself checking out a homeless man on my way into work today. Help is needed.

I’m also really trying avoid any future contact with Downeast boys because they’re only trouble from what I’ve seen and experienced and hopefully NYC is far enough away to scare them off.

Anyway this trip to visit the bestie will be just what I need. Now I just have to find a good book for the long ride down. Maybe I should start by re-reading, ‘He’s Just Not That Into You.’ Seems fitting.